I Don't Even Own a Speedo

Posted on Sat Mar 29th, 2025 @ 7:30pm by Crewman Mateo Gardel

339 words; about a 2 minute read

Personal Log – Crewman Mateo Gardel
Medical Sciences Specialist, USS Fenrir

Encrypted. Private. Don’t play this back in public, I swear.

I had a long back-and-forth with Lieutenant ch’Shaorhs tonight. Ren.

It started with a holodeck idea. First Contact simulation. Open-ended parameters, low threat profile. Pretty standard—on paper. Except… it wasn’t.

The scenario was fine. Interesting, even. But somewhere between the part where he said “mermaids or mermen” and the part where I may or may not have made a joke about my Speedo collection, things... shifted.

I don’t even own a Speedo. I was just trying to be funny.

I’m still not sure how.

I don’t think I was flirting. I mean—I wasn’t trying to. I thought I was being clever. Funny. People flirt like that, right? Maybe? I don’t know. He asked if I had a collection. Then he asked about the books I read. And I answered. Honestly.

That felt risky. It always does. And yet… he didn’t make it weird. He didn’t laugh at me. He didn’t shut down. He asked more.

And now I’m trying to figure out what that means. If anything.

I know I overthink things. I try to interpret what people say, but tone can be slippery. Facial expressions, subtext, intent—it’s like trying to read a language with half the alphabet missing. And sometimes I get it right, but sometimes I get it so wrong it’s embarrassing.

So maybe I said too much. Or maybe he meant nothing by any of it. Maybe he was just being polite. Curious. Friendly. Or maybe I missed something important, and now I’m spinning it out into a whole narrative that doesn’t exist.

Still, I’m meeting him tomorrow in the holodeck. 1800 hours. I said yes. I didn’t even hesitate. That probably says more than I want it to.

It’s just a simulation.

Just a mission.

Probably.

End log.

 

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