Terms of Counselling [2/2]

Posted on Tue Aug 19th, 2025 @ 2:04am by Petty Officer 2nd Class Khlynt Medan & Petty Officer 1st Class Gabriel Stark

2,415 words; about a 12 minute read

Mission: To Boldly Go
Location: USS Fenrir
Timeline: MD 10, 11:20

[ON]

Previously

"Hm..." it was clear Gabriel still wasn't sure how true the last might be. But he was also aware he wasn't the only one going out on a limb. It would be just as frustrating for Khlynt, if he flaked out on him after investing time and energy. If he really meant what he said. "So...how do you like to start this? I've done it every which way...writing out my timeline...going back over old psych evals...check ins on current wellbeing...even meditation, but if you want to use that as your start, I'm walking out right now."

Khlynt let out a soft hum, of observation or thought. He kept watching Gabriel but not sharply, or with judgement. It was quiet as he was catching a glimpse of something familiar. "No meditation," he said, his voice quiet but there was a hint of a smile on his face. "You have too much noise in your head for that to work...maybe we'll save it for a point where silence no longer feels like a punishment." He sat back a little bit, almost to give him some space to breathe. "We start simple...not a list. A moment. A moment that was real to you. It could be something from today, yesterday...or years ago. Just something that...is there. Something that still echoes inside of you when the ship's quiet."

Now the Continuation

Gabriel rubbed his hands slowly together as he thought it over. Did that mean good or bad? Had he left it purposefully unclear? Was that part of the revelation, whether he picked good or bad? And this was why he disliked counselling so much, because he ended up triple guessing everything. "Aria Rice," he finally replied, not sure if it was what he had meant though. "Assistant Chief Security. We've been friends a few years now. No matter what crap is thrown our way, she's always there...full of energy. Full of...goodness."

Khlynt gave a small nod of acceptance of what he was saying. He noticed he had picked a person. It spoke well for how Gabriel connected to people. "Goodness is rare," he said, with a small smile. "And it is good to see that in others. Makes life...steadier." He paused, watching him closely. "If she was here...what would she say about you?" It was an honest question but truthfully, he didn't necessarily expect Gabriel to answer it.

Gabriel gave an honest to goodness smirk as he contemplated the plethora of colourful descriptors Aria would use for him...and had. He wasn't entirely sure which way to go though. Good or bad. Or coloured by his own cynicism. "I think...she'd say I was her best friend. And the reason she gets lectures about her liver in medical check-ups."

Khlynt's eyes softened a little as he took in Gabriel's eyes. The warmth in his voice, the smirk..it was clear there was warmth there. This was an important thing to Gabriel, this friendship. A touchstone. "Best friend...or found family?" he mused, his voice steady. "I suppose those are the people who see us more clearly than anyone. They know our flaws, our strengths...they see it all and they still stay. It is...a rare kind of loyalty, isn't it? To be seen, and having that person still stay." He let it sit there for a moment, not pushing or expecting an answer. It was too soon to push too hard. He was just planting...the seed of an idea.

"Yeah, better than watching them run away screaming. Or worse, ask a million questions," Gabriel gave a slight grimace as he shook his head firmly. Not that it mattered, he'd mastered a million ways to deflect questions that risked getting too close to the bone. "You might be right though, about Aria I mean. She doesn't have much family anymore. I think the Fleet's her family now."

Later, Khlynt decided, he'd unpack Gabriel's words later. The grimace told him it was grounds best left undisturbed for a little bit. "No," he finally said. "It sounds like you are her family now," he said with a small smile, sitting back.

Gabriel opened his mouth to speak on instinct, used to having a quip or reply on the tip of his tongue...but he ended up snapping it shut again as he thought on the words. Maybe...maybe he had a point. He shifted slightly, almost embarrassed at how he hoped it was true...at how he liked the idea of it. Because it meant it went both ways. "Either way, I have her back."

"Good," Khlynt said with a small nod, accepting it as truth without hesitation. He didn't question the loyalty...just recognised it for what it was. "It's these connections that remind us there's more to all this than duty and orders."

Gabriel studied him for a long moment, thinking on the words...really thinking on them. Because he wasn't like other starfleet crew. He hadn't joined out of a desperate love for the Federation or even a need to explore. It had been better than the alternative though...languishing in a bar until his mind rotted. Maybe serving could mean more than just the Federation agenda. "So why are *you* here?"

Khlynt's eyes didn't narrow and he didn't flinch. If anything, he seemed to settle further into stillness, like something old and watchful had turned toward Gabriel. His brow lifted just slightly, a gesture of respect rather than offence. "A fair question." His voice was soft, thoughtful...but ultimately honest. "I've been many things in my life, Mister Stark. A student of power. A diplomat. A ghost in someone else’s war. And once, a man who believed silence was a virtue." He paused, just watching him for a long moment. "I have used words to manipulate, to protect, to destroy. I decided it was time I learned to use them... to heal. Even if only a little. So...Starfleet gave me asylum. And then, it gave me time. I thought I should use both wisely."

"Time..." Gabriel let out a long, tight breath as he processed Khlynt's story. Even the way the other man spoke was with a measured manner he just couldn't understand. The patience to live with that time and use it wisely. "I don't know, man..." he finally reached for his tea, taking a long mouthful. "I don't know how you do it. Sit and listen all day. I'd jump out an airlock."

"We’re different creatures, you and I," Khlynt said gently, not unkindly, watching the way Gabriel drank his tea. Wondering if it was an attempt to keep still, or to clear his mind. "You guard the perimeter. I listen for what moves beneath the ground. Different roles...but maybe serving the same purpose." He leaned back a little, not breaking eye contact. "We both try to benefit the ship and survive in a world that doesn't seem to...fit right at the seams for us."

"Does it fit right for anyone?" Gabriel asked with a slight frown as he looked to the vibrant leaves floating in his tea. "I mean, it must fit some people, or it wouldn't be built this way. But...I don't see how."

"It fits right for some," Khlynt said softly, his eyes steady on Gabriel. "Or more...it fits in the right places. The world is built for what is most typical, isn’t it? The Federation education... Starfleet. It works for the many. And for those who navigate it without losing too much of themselves, it becomes a place where their uniqueness is their armour." He looked down briefly, then back at Gabriel, his expression thoughtful. "Some attach to the ideals and believe they can make the rest of it... better, or at least bearable. Others, though, learn to bend. Not everyone fits the mould, but they find ways to survive it." His eyes flickered, a touch of quiet empathy there. "People cope in different ways, Gabriel. Some build different kinds of armour to protect the parts of themselves that don't quite match what's expected."

"I never did the school thing," Gabriel shrugged lightly as he crossed his arms, as if it didn't really matter either way. "I was tutored at home. Jumped...straight from that to Starfleet."

That explains a little of it, Khlynt thought as he watched him, but outwardly he gave a small nod. "Must have been quite a shift," he said, letting it stretch between them in silence. He could see the young man closing up. Shields raised, pushing it down. Not compartmentalising, more....putting it somewhere for later. Most likely into a bathtub already overflowing.

"You could say that," Gabriel murmured as he took a great deal of interest in studying his nails. Starfleet was supposed to have been his first taste of freedom...but it was just another set of rules and orders. "It was meant to be a compromise. I wanted to go to university, father wanted me to serve government or military. I suppose as with a lot of compromises, it just ended up being wrong for everyone."

Khlynt gave a small nod, his eyes going over him. At the way he avoided looking at him. Or anything or consequence. "Not...too wrong," he finally said and took his mint tea. He sipped it. Not cold, not hot. And tepid was a word he didn't enjoy using. But it was there, the scent fresh. He let the words hang for a moment. "You wear the uniform well."

Gabriel met his eyes with surprise, trying to work out if he meant it or if he was just trying to give him a confidence boost. "I try," he admitted quietly, like it was some dirty little secret. "I don't know when, but at somepoint, I started trying."

"Good," Khlynt said, firmly, but there was a small smile touching his lips. "Do you...know why you started trying?" he let the question hang...sat in the quiet stillness for a moment. A door slightly opened, to allow Gabriel to step through if he choose to. And if not, he wouldn't be penalised. This was only their first session. And he knew he was approaching the limit of what Gabriel could give and still walk out of the room without spiralling.

Gabriel shrugged, sighing as he shook his head and looked away. As much as people had labelled him as a fast learner over the years, he wasn't great at identifying his own feelings. He was so used to acting on impulse, it was often done with so quickly it was hard to pinpoint the 'why's and 'what's. "Vanity. I...couldn't resist trying to be good at something."

"Vanity is a strong motivator," Khlynt said and then his smile warmed. "As is spite. And the want to prove people wrong."

"Think I'm a spiteful brat?" Gabriel chuckled hoarsely though, shaking his head lightly as he looked away, his thumbnail scraping at the arm of the chair. "You wouldn't be the first to think so."

"No," Khlynt said with a soft chuckle, shaking his head. "No more than I am. Or the next person down the corridor." He looked at him, eyes landing on the movement of his fingers. "It's a common thing that most intelligent species have. I like to think it is part of the trait that makes us stand up after being knocked down."

"Ah, so a dash of stubbornness with a pinch of revenge," Gabriel replied dryly, his gaze finding his again before he shook his head firmly. "Either way, it's not exactly the noble beginnings most Starfleet have. The need to achieve."

"Beginnings...can depend on many things," Khlynt said quietly as he met his eyes. "Just because people say one thing doesn't mean it is the truth of it. Although...I suspect it is easier for some to want to...embody what the Federation stands for. But different experiences and perspectives are exactly what Starfleet needs."

"It's so naive," Gabriel suddenly said, looking to his hands with a frown, one nail picking anxiously at the skin of another. "Expecting to go out into the universe, make friends, have everyone greet you with open arms and good intentions."

Khlynt watched him, studying how he moved before he looked away. "Yes...perhaps it is," he said softly. He let out a soft breath as he looked at him. "But luckily, we have people like you to keep those naive explorers safe."

Gabriel held his breath. Because he'd hit on exactly why he stayed and did what he did. And the feel of someone cutting that close to the bone sent a shiver up his spine. "Someone has to fool-proof the place..." he muttered.

"Yes," Khlynt said softly, giving a small nod at that. He agreed with it, openly. No hidden games. And he let it sit there for a moment, that agreement. He knew time was up, their session ended. But he had no meeting afterwards, so he simply sipped his tea.

Gabriel searched his features with surprise, laughing softly as he pulled his legs up to sit cross-legged in the chair, leaning forward to him. "What? No rebuke? No dignified and weary correction?"

"Why, you've not said anything that wasn't true," Khlynt said with a chuckle. "There will always be fools. And by fools, I mean the idealists who don't see the shadow standing behind the person they're talking to. Organisations only work if there is a balance, between those with the hearts...and those with the minds. A nice, healthy dose of realism. If everyone was the same, thought the same...corruption could happen far more easily. No. You have a healthy stance. I would not even call it cynical."

"Hm..." Gabriel sat back slowly, his shoulders relaxing and lowering just a touch. He watched him intently, trying to work out if he was just telling him what he wanted to hear, or if he meant it. "I guess I can tell which one you are then..."

Khlynt nodded, watching him for a long moment before he smiled. "Most likely you can, Mister Stark. And just as well. That way, we have no lies between each other. I think that...we can both work with."

OFF:

PO2 Khlynt Medan
Counsellor
USS Fenrir
(PNPC Hanlon)

PO1 Gabriel Stark
Security
USS Fenrir
(PNPC Blake)

 

RSS Feed